Vote Kitty LeClaw!!!

A million Killer Kittens thanks to faithful THOIA reader Noel Tuazon for this spine-chilling surveillance cam footage from inside the Ms. Horror Blogosphere voting booth!

Ms. Horror Blogosphere 2009

In case you've been off from school with mono, and didn't hear the news: The Vault of Horror is currently collecting votes for the Ms. Horror Blogosphere feature/contest which has been running over the last couple of weeks.

The contest boasts over 20 entries from some really fabulous blogs/blogettes -- including a submission from Yours Truly! If you're interested in exploring the weird, wonderful world of female horror blogging, head on over to The Vault for a meet & greet with the contestants! And don't forget the customary bucket of pigs' blood!

This contest is now closed.
Warm and fuzzy Killer Kittens thanks to all
who took the time to vote for their favourite feline!

Jucifer... Live.

Warning: This Show is NOT Suitable for Epileptics

The first time I saw Jucifer play, I was astounded. Going on the advice of a couple of friends who said I "had to" see them live, I conducted none of my own research, and therefore had no idea what to expect. I was completely unprepared. In retrospect, I should have taken along earplugs, sunglasses, and a sturdy chair to steady myself against.

Backed by a retina-dazzling light show, and a literal "wall of sound," Jucifer is comprised of lead vocalist/guitar virtuosa Amber Valentine, and psychopathic beat monger Edgar Livengood. At first glance, the pair appear to be almost certainly insane. Upon second glance, all suspicions are confirmed.

Their songs were brilliantly woven into one massive orchestral noise arrangement, thus sparing their audience the trouble of deciding how best to react to something so frightfully moving. Somehow, applause does not seem appropriate. Valentine and Livengood storm through their set, each of them completely lost in the gruelling performance. Guitar Girl Goddess Valentine twists, leaps, and writhes (in a dress and heels), while Livengood engages in a heated verbal exchange with an unseen antagonist as he beats his drum kit with his bare fists. Clearly, this is some wild, heavy shit.

Jucifer's performance is an art which eludes capture, as their studio recordings bear little resemblance to the live experience. As the Jucifer.com bio proclaims: "See them while you can still get close enough to be spit on." Just be sure to bring your earplugs. And sunglasses. And a sturdy chair to steady yourself against.

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Jucifer Live in North Carolina (January, 2009)

Arcanifacts: Ensanguined Tatters

In honour of my birthday (4/22), I received a very strange and unusual package from Karswell Manor...

My pulse quickened, and my blood ran ice cold when I first laid eyes upon this most curious artifact. Fashioned in the image of the Blessed Virgin, this vessel once contained Holy Water. Now, it holds the "Ensanguined tatters from Justine's shroud." An inverted cross dangles above the blood-soaked cloth within; a warning that the vessel's seal is never to be broken, lest the wrath of Alucarda's lover be awakened once again from her undead slumber. The fragrant sealing wax barely masks the pungent stench of the grave, and the vessel radiates a strange energy I have never before encountered.

I daren't even ponder the fiendish secrets that linger within, hungrily awaiting release...

"Ensanguined tatters from Justine's shroud."

The creator of this stunning piece of horror fancy is award-winning artist and author Scott D. Ryersson, the mastermind behind Arcanifacts which, loosely translated, means secret thing made. Ryersson set up shop in 2007 "to further explore his artistic obsessions with the arcane and phantasmagorical."

After seeing photographs of the arcanifact Ryersson produced for Karswell based on Night of the Demon, I was excited to learn that THOIA's spooktacular host had commissioned one for me, as well. Eagerly I awaited my gift, knowing nothing about it other than the Alucarda theme, and that a portion of the piece had come from Guadalajara, Mexico.

The ensanguined tatters from Justine's shroud now sit proudly beneath Alucarda's portrait, adding a touch more malevolence to my living room.

Happy Friday the 13th!

The Creepshow (November 26, 2008)

Canada's Premiere Psychobilly band, THE CREEPSHOW, brought their high-energy, low-filler act to town once again on November 26 @ Bar None in Kingston. The official band the Rue Morgue Festival Fear for two years running were fresh off a European tour, and re-acclimated themselves to the fretfully low temperatures in the Great White North by playing to a packed house of dedicated fans and followers.

While showering the crowd with product-placement gifts of Jägermeister t-shirts, pins, and stickers, they played a lineup of favourites from their acclaimed debut album, Sell Your Soul, as well as a collection of tunes from Run For Your Life, the follow-up album they released in September, 2008.

View more of THE CREEPSHOW on Kitty's Flickr

THE CREEPSHOW is touring extensively right now, so who knows? You may find them creepin' into a honkey tonk near you in the not-too-distant future!

"Take My Hand"
on YouTube

Black Devil Rock God: A Portrait

Black Devil Rock God
Acrylic on Mystery Wood

Pictured is Punky, the bratty guitarist from blasphemous heavy/industrial band Voice of God. Completing this piece was a momentous occasion for me, as this was my first attempt at painting a man's face.

The female lines are so much more pronounced, and seem to be more easily translated into brush strokes (at least for hack hobby artists, like myself). I have always maintained the theory that it is far more difficult to find the appropriate focal points in a man's face without overemphasizing them. After all, can a woman's eyes ever be too large, or her lips too full? No, but a man's certainly can. Masculinity is far more subtle, and fragile than I had originally estimated.

Dead? Alive?

Not dead. Not alive. Hanging on a laundry line, somewhere in between.

Since my last post here, I've been sick. Real sick. Sicker than 8 bitches on a bitch boat.

I know what you're thinking: "Is it contagious? Can I get it from reading your blog?" The answer is NO, but there's a lot of other nasty junk floating around in here that could pose a potential risk to your overall health and well-being. The management assumes no responsibility...

As it turns out, The Sickness is really more like a Lifelong Ailment, which isn't nearly as bad as it sounds. 4/5 medical professionals think I'll go on to lead a normal, uneventful life. The 5th medical professional wanted me to tell you to keep tha eff back while the moon is full. And also, to beware the moors.

So... in the off chance that anyone is still reading this blog, now that I am on a steady dose of Deadly Nightshade and feeling much more like myself, real, actual content is most definitely forthcoming. Grab yourself a naked witch, a horned god, and get on down to the clearing in the woods -- next time we gather here, we'll be discussing one my all-time favourites, Alucarda (note the appropriately demonic URL).

Until then, please remember to wash your hands. I touched everything in here.

Possession by Post

On most days, poor Kitty only gets bills, flyers, and veterinary hospital closure notices in the mail. Under the right circumstances (full moon, the presence of an unbaptized male child), and under the rarest of conditions (Sabbat, at midnight, full moon thing still in full effect), better mail is sometimes obtained.

My cotton-o-riffic T-Shirt from The Horrors of it All is more than just an item of clothing. It has a lifeforce all it's own, which I hope people are prepared to handle. Currently, I am only beginning to pick up the jagged pieces of my life, left in the wake of a sudden and "mysteriously" inspired feeding frenzy. There go my summer holidays!

Mr. Karswell... thank you? You know how I've been trying to eat less meat. Back to the clawing board -- drawing board!

I need to rest now... I hear there's a Ratman loose on the premises...

{Psst -- ratty radness coming soon!!}

Interview With Bill Moseley (Circa. 1999)

Thanks to my longtime friend and web host with the most, Jason, the following interview, which I thought was lost forever, has at last been restored to me. The following piece means a lot to me for a number of reasons. It was originally posted on a web site I hosted in a previous life, at a time when the Internet was still gaining momentum toward becoming the one-stop media powerhouse that exists today.

It is my pleasure to re-present the interview I did with Bill Moseley, best known for his portrayal of "Otis" in Rob Zombie's House of 1000 Corpses, and The Devil's Rejects. While Mr. Moseley is hot!hot!hot! genre meat right now, he wasn't nearly so well-known at the time he gave this interview. He had TCM 2 under his belt, and was just gearing up to film Corpses.


On February 12, 1999 my year-long search for the phenomenal actor who gave me one more reason to love chainsaw movies ended! After viewing Bill Moseley's comments in the guestbook here, I decided to pester him into giving an Interview via email for Arachnia's Den of the Deceived. Not only did he comply, but he complied with kindness.

To the seasoned Horror fan, Mr. Moseley needs no introduction, but for those who aren't familiar with his work, you can catch him in the absolutely amazing Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 as "Chop Top", the lovable maniac who enjoys nothing more than a little head cheese and carving himself up like a turkey. Of course, he's also made notable appearances in other Horror greats such as: Night of the Living Dead '90, Silent Night Deadly Night III, and The Blob. This is by no means his full repertoire, but I could spend all day talking about the man. I'd rather you read the interview, you've 'read' enough of me at this point!


Q: Most people will list the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre as being one of their most memorable film experiences ever. Did this factor come into play at all in terms of feeling like you had some big shoes to fill with TCM 2? Or was it viewed amongst cast & crew as being something entirely different and separate from the original concept (which I actually think it ended up being, quite effectively)?

A: Did the original "chainsaw" make for big shoes to fill for "Saw 2"? Definitely. We were all excited about carrying on the tradition; I think the idea of ":Saw 2" fired up the morale of the cast & crew, but it never overpowered or cowed us. Can you imagine a more FUN job? Tobe Hooper at the helm, Kit Carson at the typewriter, Tom "King of splatter" Savini and his henchmen (Mitch DeVane, John Vulich, Gabe Bartolos, Gino Crognale (sp?), Sean McEnroe (sp?)) there to greet you every morning before dawn with cold glue and rubber appliances? No, you just can't beat fun at the old Chainsaw factory!


Q: In my own personal opinion, the Leatherface we are introduced to in TCM 2 actually surpasses Gunnar Hansen in overall creepiness. Do you have any thoughts on this yourself, or any comments about the transition we saw the leatherface character make from the original film to it's sequel? (He seemed to go from a supressed cross-dresser to 'product of brother and sister sleeping together' chansaw-wielding romantic-freak)

A: I never worked with Gunnar Hansen, but I loved everything about him in Saw 1, his fretting, his violence, the wide wide turns he made with smoking saw, his authority with the sledge. Bill Johnson was my Bubba, and we bonded like brothers on the set and off. The first nine days on the set for us, we sat in his or my little trailer cubby playing gin rummy. nine days in full makeup and wardrobe, and they NEVER used us! We got to be pretty good friends, and pretty good gin sharps. Bill lived in austin, a "local hire," married, worked as a bartender- you can see him for a second or two in the opening of "D.O.A."- he's the desk cop. anywho, what he did in the radio station with Stretch was one of the creepiest seductions I've ever seen - and man, that boy could really use his tongue!

My idea of "Saw 3"- conceived about a week after I'd gotten back to New york City from "Saw 2"- had Leatherface and Stretch married, living in New york, Stretch pushing a bone baby carriage with a baby in a cute little leather mask. Bubba had gotten "discovered" by the artsy fartsy crowd for his "sculptures," the Cook was chef of the best Tex-Mex chili parlour in town, and ChopTop had made it big as a rapper ("he-he-he-head cheese!") after a stint pushing a hot dog cart in Central Park. Whoops, I'm getting off the subject. Bill Johnson gave Bubba soul - and as his older brother, I deep down appreciated that he "turn traitor for a piece of tail."


Q: Along the same lines, what was the basis for the Chop Top character in TCM 2? Is he the same person we were introduced to in the first film (the "hitch-hiker" with an affliction for self-inflicted injuries) or is it another Sawyer brother that's just been locked in the attic until this movie was shot? If in fact, it's the same character, to what extent did you study Edwyn Neal's protrayal of the role? For what it's worth, I think a tremendous job was done on your part in carrying on the same basic character type (i.e. mannerisms, disposition, etc.) if in fact this was the objective.

A: ChopTop was Hitchhiker's twin brother who'd been fighting for his country in VietNam while Saw 1 was taking place. Thanks to a lucky head wound, courtesy of "a gook with a machete," I got a big payout from Uncle Sam, more than enough to bankroll the family chili business, buy the "Rolling Grille a go go," our cool pickup truck and some gasoline and oil for Bubba's chainsaws. Not only did i come back with a plate in my head, an itchy one at that, I came back with an attitude. Used to be that Drayton, the oldest brother, ran the family. but seeing as how I was bankrolling the operation, I got some big ideas about realizing MY dream, Namland! Vietnam theme park! Hell, we were already living beneath Texas Battleland- Namland would have been a snap to pull off!

Ed Neal rules. I met him at Universal Studios, LA, when he and the Saw 1 bunch were inducted into the Horror Hall of Fame. What he did as hitchhiker will forever blow my mind. For me, the first thing I found as Chop Top (originally named Platehead - but I think there was already a Masters of the Universe character registered by that name) was that VOICE. then when I came down to austin and they SHAVED MY HEAD, the twitching began. I was fully willing and able to be a geek for the two-plus months we shot Saw 2. I had a beautiful girlfriend at the time (the mother of my now 11-year-old daughter), so I didn't sweat the girls all running in the opposite direction. Baldness runs in the family, so I found it cool to be Mr. Cueball, knowing (and hoping) that my hair would indeed grow back.

I worked so many hours a day - four hours of makeup each morning, hour and a half to remove it, hour to and from the set, plus working time - that my brain just melted somewhere along the way. i never BECAME ChopTop off the set - I didn't slash anyone, stomp kittens, etc. but I've always loved him.


Q: One of the things that influenced my opinion of TCM 2 was the fact that it put a different spin on the "damsel in distress" situation. Caroline Williams (Stretch) wasn't the stereotypical "screaming beauty" we've been exposed to in the past (PJ Soles immediately comes to mind). On the contrary, she was brave (but not to the point of being blatantly stupid), tough as nails, and when she screamed, you didn't just feel the hair on the back of your neck stand up, you felt it right in your gut. Now that's a Scream Queen! Was this "new approach" to the woman in danger aspect of the film intentional, or am I just imagining it because Ms. Williams did such a great job with the role? (Also loved her in Leprechaun 4)

A: Caroline williams was so a blast to work with. She was a local hire out of Dallas. She told me for for her audition, she ran screaming into the office where Toby and Kit were waiting for her, slammed the door behind her and piled up all the furniture in the room against the door! We've been great good friends since Saw 2, live in the same town, still keep working as actors, talk as often as we can. I stay in touch with Tobe and Jim Sidedow, too.


Q: I've often wondered, does an actor have to be equally as twisted to do a good job with a slasher role as the people who enjoy watching the performance, or does it only seem that way? I mean, am I wrong in assuming that you must have felt just a little different about yourself, carried yourself a bit differently, after hacking the Hell out of L.G. in the radio station lobby? In a nutshell, does it help to be just a little bit looney?

A: Yes, I am a bit looney. I've always loved horror films, monsters, dinosaurs, space travel. when I was a kid of 8 or 9, I founded the Hairy Monsters Club in my hometown of Barrington, Illinois, still have my membership card! I loved Famous Monster of Filmland, disobeying my parents and sneaking into the library long after I'd been put to bed to watch Boris Karloff on our black & white TV - in chicago we had "Shock Theater."

I loved making faces of sheer terror in the bathroom mirror. And I always felt an obligation when I acted in horror films to give the audience the real deal, no fake stuff, because as a young horror fan, the real stuff was what gave me the four-star chills. I guess fear was my first drug of choice - right, Sigmund? I loved throwing snowballs at passing cars, getting them to stop and maybe, gasp, chase me and my little pals. Making a living being a monster was for me a dream come true! You just can't beat fun at the old boneyard!


Q: You mentioned when you signed the guestbook here that Mr. Hooper and yourself are in the midst of discussing a possible comeback for the guy who's plate we'd all love to lick. Is this for real? Anything you can say about it, is it under wraps, or still just a vague semblance of an idea? Would Chop Top get the floor to himself or be spazzing it up once again with Leatherface and the gang? (By the way, I absolutely ADORE Jim Sideow, I hope he'll make it back for a new installment in the series if there is to be one.)

A: Tobe and I are talking about doing something together. I just did a Chop Top cameo for his son, Tony's 10-minute digital video called The All-American Chainsaw Massacre. ChopTop as an older man, with flashbacks using a ChopTop lookalike named Tod Bates. Hell, I'm not that old, but Tod was willing to work for the thrill of it, and I'm getting used to money. I'm not sure what the story will be with tobe, but I'll keep you posted as things progress. It will focus on ChopTop, or whatever his name will be to keep us legal and independent. I just got back from Haiti, and down there i was sketching out some ideas that are fun, scary and very very weird.

Finally, pant, pant, I just want to say that Jim Siedow is god. He's old as the hills, so i'm not sure what his future holds in terms of feature films, but I'd love to fly down to Houston and shoot some home movies of him and wife Ruth kicking back in their hammocks or lawn chairs or whatever they do down there in the cactus belt. When I first got to Austin, full of excitement and fear in equal parts, just seeing Jim walking around the motel was so uplifting, such a psych that it gave me LOVE for Chop Top and Chainsaw. The only other time I've had that feeling was when I happened to see Muhammad Ali walking through Chicago's O'Hare airport one time. Without thinking, I gushed, "It's the champ!" He looked up and smiled at me as he passed. Same feeling seeing Jim Siedow. My heart leaped up. And hell, he's a dirty old man with some sick jokes and a great sense of humor.

Well, my fingers are bleeding and my morning coffee's starting to wear off. My kid's still sleeping (day off for Lincoln's Birthday) and in the distance I hear what may well be a chainsaw laboring through a tree (a human body?). So I'll say ta-ta, and for all you fans, LICK MY PLATE, YOU DOG DICKS!!!!

- Bill Moseley

I Can Haz Michael Myers?

As irrelevant as it may be at this juncture, I decided to post this photograph, anyway.

Last weekend, my sister picked up several DVDs from one of our local trading posts, and among the selection was Rob Zombie's Halloween. I will probably never get around to posting my comments on this film, as I just don't know that I have the stomach for it. Regardless of the level of disappointment I felt inside while re-watching RZH (I caught it when it opened in theatres), I can't seem to rid my mind of the pasty-white face of William Shatner with a mess of scraggly, brown hair sewn on top.

I've got Michael Myers on the brain, bitches!

Most people don't know this, but he is actually much shorter in person than he appears on film.

Kitty with Miniature Michael Myers
Halloween, 2007

Isn't that the sweetest homemade raccoon costume you've ever seen? My tail was made from a crazy, fur hat I picked up at the Salvation Army (for $1), cut, and spray-painted. Truly, it was legend.

Last House on the Left: The Worst is Yet To Come!

I painted this in 2005, with one main objective: cover the hideous artwork on the massive canvas I got as a parting gift when the organization I was working for closed down. More importantly, I wanted to cover it with something bad ass. I had never painted anything in my life, but I was willing to give it a try.

It took me almost an entire month, and I must have listened to the A Night of Rehearsal: 20 Years Ago album by King Diamond's first band, The Black Rose, a thousand times over in the process of creating this giant piece of art.

Last House on the Left: The Worst is Yet To Come!

Acrylic on Canvas
8 feet wide x 6 feet high

Hanging in my living room.

She's a big girl.

Wolf in Grandma's Clothing

I took this shot for my photography class in Grade 11. At the time, I would have been listening to a lot of White Zombie, and experimenting with marijuana. I was so happy to finally be in the 11th Grade because it meant I had the opportunity to select photography as an elective. I remember that I was only kid in the class not taking pictures of flower beds or pets. Instead, I submitted pictorials featuring my gothed-up Barbie dolls in dangerous predicaments, and plastic fangs in cups.

Not much has really changed since then, I suppose. I live in a small town, so most of the time, I still feel like the only kid in the class taking photos of weird shit.

Wolf in Grandma's Clothing
Scanned from an original photograph
(No bloody idea what film/shutter speed; this baby is over a decade old)

Posing With Evil Genius (Geniuses? Genii?)

I had never really thought that my list of Brushes With Celebrity was all that impressive. Upon hunting all my souvenir photographs down individually, one by one, for uploading to my web-based photo dumping warehouse, I have concluded that I've actually done pretty well for myself. I am the only person I know who has hugged the lovely and talented Bill Moseley on two separate occasions. The fact that I don't really know all that many people doesn't detract from my sense of accomplishment in the least.

Okay, so I may have included a few photos of people who aren't exactly known to have evil leaking from their pores. Just because these folks have never portrayed a crazed, murderous psychopath doesn't make them bad people.

Bill Moseley posing with me at Chiller Con 13 (New Jersey, USA)



Bill Moseley posing with my sister and I at
Rue Morgue Festival of Fear 2004 (Toronto, Canada)



Sid Haig posing with me at Chiller Con 13



Kane Hodder posing with me at Chiller Con 13



Andrew Bryniarski posing with my sister and I at
Rue Morgue Festival of Fear 2005 After-Party (*drunk*)



A really sweet pic of Tony Todd drinkin' his drink at
Rue Morgue Festival of Fear 2005 After-Party



Tony Todd posing (and drinking!) with my sister and I,
and some other d00d who has not given permission to appear on
Killer Kittens From Beyond The Grave



Doug Bradley at Rue Morgue Festival of Fear 2004
(we saw him *drunk* at the After-Party, but did not shutter-stalk him there)



Lloyd Kaufman and the Troma Team posing with my sister and I,
and some other d00d who has not given permission to appear on
Killer Kittens From Beyond The Grave

(I love this pic -- it's one of my all-time favourites)



Clive Barker with Jovanka Vuckovic of Rue Morgue Magazine at
Rue Morgue Festival of Fear 2005 (I met him, shook his hand, but didn't
get a picture of our intimate moment. Damned batteries!)



Terry and Dean (David Lawrence and Paul Spence) from FUBAR
posing with me, and some other d00d who has not given permission to appear on
Killer Kittens From Beyond The Grave

FUBAR isn't exactly a horror film, but that in no way interferes with its greatness.



Joey "Shithead" Keithley posing with me at his book signing at
Novel Idea (Kingston, Canada)



Joey "Shithead" Keithley performing with DOA at
Scherzo Pub (RIP) (Kingston, Canada)



Tickets to the Ministry concert I attended in 2007 (Ottawa, Canada).
Okay, so I didn't actually meet any of the band members, but I was front-row-center,
and Al Jourgensen totally looked at me. Sweet eye contact...