Showing posts with label 5/5 Kitty Skulls. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 5/5 Kitty Skulls. Show all posts

Friday, March 19, 2010

The Kids in the Hall: Death Comes to Town [2010]




Canadian Comedic Royalty, The Kids in the Hall, brought a painful 15-year drought to a most gruesome end this year with the debut of their eight part miniseries, Death Comes to Town.

This delightfully different offering from the daring darlings of sketch comedy focuses on the curiosity cabinet that is Shuckton, a small (fictional*) town with a big dream to one day host the Olympics. All the usual cross-dressing, gender-bending, and dark, dark humour that KITH fans have come to expect from the 5-man troupe is mixed liberally with... brutal murder!!! Yes, that's right -- it's a good, old-fashioned whodunnit, KITH-style!


Star hockey player turned 600 lb. shut-in, Ricky Jarvis (Bruce McCulloch) is determined to catch the killer, before Death comes for him, too! For such a seemingly quiet little town, the people of Shuckton sure have an awful lot of skeletons stashed away in their closets. The murderer could be any one of a handful of people, and with Death literally nipping at his heels, Ricky must act quickly to solve the mystery. Marnie (Kevin McDonald), the "fuzzy" pizza delivery lady, is Ricky's sleuthing partner. She acts as his "eyes and ears" until he is able to lose enough weight to leave his house for the first time in years.

The murder investigation centers around a number of shady characters. Petty criminal and germ gel addict Crim Hollingsworth (Scott Thompson**), who happens to be 1/16 Native, is arrested after he is found covered in the victim's blood -- but he has no memory of committing the crime. Dusty Diamond, the town coroner (Thompson), seems to have an obsessive homoerotic fixation with the recently deceased, which is definitely suspicious. Heather Weather (Thompson), Shuckton's aging barometric bombshell, was having an affair with the victim, and is known to have a viciously vengeful streak. And then there's the victim's wife, Marilyn (Dave Foley), a closet drinker, who stood to gain a great deal in the event of her husband's demise...




As the citizens of Shuckton struggle to sort out amongst themselves who is responsible for the grisly, bludgeoning death of one of their own, the viewer is privy to information about who the real culprit is... Death Himself (played by Mark McKinney). Death carries a bitter hatred for the brainless, bumbling citizens of Shuckton, and would savour nothing more than to see every last one of them laid six feet beneath the Earth. Scythe in hand, he is ready to kick some serious ass.



While the work The Kids in the Hall did in their long-running (1988-1995) eponymous television series is virtually untouchable in terms of groundbreaking comedic genius, Death Comes to Town was greatly successful in providing an alternate venue for the showcasing of the Kids' unbeatable chemistry, without detracting in any way from the legacy of the original show. Hardcore fans will be happy to see some classic characters (such as the dumbass OPP Cops, The Chicken Lady, and towel-clad Bellini), while undoubtedly forming lasting relationships with the new ones created exclusively for Death Comes to Town.



Sadly, there are no plans to extend the series beyond the original 8 episodes. The Kids in the Hall have individually noted that they have no plans to return to the studio to reprise the roles which made them famous. Death Comes to Town aired it's final episode on CBC March 16, 2010.



5/5 Kitty Skulls..... Pick of the litter!


_________________

NOTES


* Death Comes to Town was largely shot in North Bay, Ontario (CA). Kitty has relatives there, but doubts they woke up at the crack of dawn to chase the guys for autographs, as she almost certainly would have.

** While I thought he looked fantastic in Death Comes to Town, it is worth noting that Scott Thompson (Dusty Diamond, Crim Hollingsworth, Heather Weather) was diagnosed with inoperable stomach cancer in early 2009. To the credit of one of the funniest men in Canada, Thompson reports that he is cancer free after undergoing four months of radiation therapy and six rounds of chemo. Cheers to a happy, healthy, productive (more stuff with the troupe -- pleeeease!) future for the irreplaceable "Buddy Cole"!


Hockey Night in Shuckton
(stick-slappin' fun game to play online)

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Don't Deliver Us From Evil (1971)



Caution: Spoilers Galore


Shipped off to religious boarding school by parents who ignored them, budding young women Anne de Boissy (Jeanne Goupil) and Lore Fournier (Catherine Wagener) became the closest of friends. Each night while in the convent, they would secretly share Anne's bed to read steamy passages together underneath the sheets. They exploited every opportunity afforded them to do wrong. Things they liked to do for fun included breaking rules, mocking Christianity, torturing pets, composing dark literature, and leading men into temptation. Together, they were preparing a very special ceremony to renounce Christ, and commit their lives to doing evil.



"Lore and me get such pleasure when we do
something wrong. To sin has become our chief aim.
Let the other idiots live their lives doing good.
We shall dedicate our lives to Satan, our Lord and Master."


As one might expect, all Hell breaks loose when Anne's parents, the Count and Countess, go away for the summer, leaving Anne all alone in the chateau, but for a few servants. Satan's willing, young slaves use this time to engage in some of their favourite pastimes, like arson, and leading even more men into temptation.



The beautiful Lore uses her god-given attributes to drive unsuspecting gents into a state of mad lust. Ample servings of sleaze follow the girls through several uncomfortable encounters of coerced near-rape for the purposes of fulfilling their Satanic mantra. What truly shook the foundations of this particular viewer was the way in which the diabolical duo leaped from one dangerously evil venture to another with blatant disregard for even their own personal safety. Clearly, these young women were not merely playing at evil. They were ready to give their very lives for it.

Ultimately, their summer of reckless abandon catches up with them. Lore breaks down before her friend, admitting that she is afraid of being caught, imprisoned, and separated from Anne. The dark, exotic beauty reassures the delicate, sobbing blonde that they will never be parted.



"When this fleeting life is done,
we will be together forever."


Mais ne Nous Délivrez Pas du Mal (Don't Deliver Us from Evil) is a taut, sleazy horror drama from French writer/director Joël Séria, based loosely on the notoriously fatal friendship of Pauline Parker and Juliet Hulme. The pair made shocking headlines in 1954 when they murdered Parker's mother after making plans to escape to the United States to work together in literature and film. Parker and Hulme's bizarre escapades were detailed in the Academy Award-winning Peter Jackson film Heavenly Creatures.

Although the American Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has yet to recognize Séria's efforts in re-telling the story with a Satanic twist, Don't Deliver Us from Evil is a certified cult cinema classic, brought back to life (with subtitles!) by the good folks at Mondo Macabro. Many thanks to Karswell for contributing this titillating title to the Killer Kittens library!





5/5 Kitty Skulls = Pick of the litter!

Saturday, November 14, 2009

The Devil's Nightmare (1974)




Caution: Spoilers Galore


Jean Brismée's La Plus Longue Nuit du Diable (The Devil's Nightmare) opens in Nazi Germany, with a birth and a baby killing. Baron Von Rhoneberg (Jean Servais) pulls a dagger from its sheath, and skewers his daughter within minutes of her birth. With a great war raging over land, sea, and sky, I suppose he figured nobody would notice the execution of just one baby.

The viewer time-travels to present day 1974. A group of seven impossibly-linked travelers are forced to spend the night in Von Rhoneberg's gothic castle due to a blockage of the main road. The tourists are a diverse lot. Father Alvin Sorel (Jacques Monseau) is a handsome priest with an honourable dedication to the virtues of the cross, and an admirable resistance of the pleasures of the flesh. Howard and Nancy are an unhappily married couple, bound together by money rather than any sort of romantic feelings toward one another. Erotic tension is provided by Regine (the Blonde Bombshell) and Corinne (the Brunette Bimbo), a pair of strikingly-beautiful girls with decidedly lesbionic tendencies. Mason is a formidably un-sexy, bespectacled old geezer, and rounding out the bottom of the barrel is Ducha, a greasy sweatball in a cheap suit.


Upon arrival at the castle, Nazi Lurch shows the guests to their rooms, taking great care to make them aware of the "gruesome stories" attached to each one. Evidently, Von Rhoneberg's staff have much to learn about running a successful bed and breakfast!

A beautiful, auburn-haired woman named Lisa Müller (Erika Blanc) arrives late to the castle, asking to be put up for the night. By the way the Von Rhoneberg's servant greets her, the viewer is left with the impression that the lovely Lisa has some sort of history with the Baron. She changes into her best floor-length gown with the stomach cut out, and joins the rest of the guests for dinner. All points considered, Lisa seems the perfect candidate to fulfill the Von Rhoneberg Curse of the Succubus that the Baron not-so-subtly mentioned to his house guests earlier.





Demons that adopt feminine appearances
in order to seduce men and lead them to perdition.


For the architecture nuts out there, here are a few neat-o features the old castle boasted. Talk about well-appointed!

  • a nifty alchemy lab in the basement (which the Baron uses to seek out "philosophical truths," and also to make gold)
  • a tortured cat in the attic
  • a sarcophagus (which functions suspiciously like an iron maiden)
  • a guillotine
  • wallpaper that matched the bedspread (in every room)

When the castle guests retire to their rooms for the night is when the fun really begins! Lisa the Succubus (or Lisabus, if you will) focuses her attention on the dashing, young priest. I suspect the soul of a clergyman fetches a much higher price in Hell than that of an Everyday Joe. Showing impeccable control over both his mind and his sex organs, Father Sorel resists temptation. Lisabus will have to return later to make a second attempt at Seduction of the Innocent...



Can't you talk about anything else, besides succubuses?


Seduction of the Fab Slob, Seduction of the Married Douche, and Seduction of the Brunette Bimbo go a lot more smoothly for Lisabus. The Slob consumes one too many glasses of poisonous demon wine. The Douche and the Brunette Bimbo sneak off to find a quiet place to fornicate, and instead wind up losing a battle to the guillotine and the iron maiden, respectively. Mrs. Douche's greed for the Baron's gold leads to her untimely demise, and the Geezer, being a geezer, can only run so fast. Meanwhile, Blondie's see-thru nightie is no match for the massive python conjured by Lisabus!



This is a very weird castle... Very weird, indeed!


Father Sorel finally sees Lisabus for what she truly is, in the midst of a steamy, slow-strip seduction sequence. Perhaps if he kisses his rosary an appropriate number of times, and thrusts it at the demon just so...?



The Devil's Nightmare is a shining example of what a Satano-themed 1970's cult film should be. Briskly paced, brilliantly scored, and remarkably well acted, this Belgian-Italian co-production delivers the very best in late-night horror delight. Even the Devil himself (Daniel Emilfork) drops by to join in the fun and frolic! I proudly submit The Devil's Nightmare as my 100th post.







5/5 Kitty Skulls = Pick of the litter!

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

The Cat With Hands (2001)



Last night, as I slumbered, I had a strange dream
One that seemed to bring distant friends near
I dreamt of the faces of people I loved
And I awoke with an 'eart full of cheer


Recently, my paws came upon* the spine-tingling short, THE CAT WITH HANDS, and the brilliantly-realized nightmare world created therein continues to haunt my unguarded moments. Part live-action exchange between a rot-mouthed old man and his young assistant on the dreary, English countryside, and part sumptuous, animated feast of imagined terror, the film lends a macabre, new meaning to the old adage about cats and tongues. You know the one...




This time, you can not count on me to give it all away, other than to say that this film is a real dark chocolate treat for the senses, although super-short at just over 3 minutes long. Creator Robert Morgan apparently snatched the idea from a recurring dream that plagued his sister: "a cat with human hands chased her and some friends around a graveyard. When it touched them, with those hands, the girls turned into spastics."**

Make sure the window is cracked enough to admit the scent of burning leaves, grab your favourite afghan from the closet, and enjoy this visually stunning, Poe-flavoured morsel!






5/5 Kitty Skulls ... Pick of the litter!


* Thanks, Karswell
* Source: No fat clips!!!

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Alucarda (1978)



Caution: Spoilers Galore


A beautiful, young woman (Tina Romero) has just given birth to a daughter in a most desolate place. She hands the infant to a straw-covered old goat of a woman, instructing her to protect the child, “and don’t let him take her away.” The Goat Woman whisks the child off, leaving the young woman alone and frightened. The structure begins to echo with disembodied growls and unholy groans, while the young woman grimaces in terror. Methinks the little girl’s Daddy might have some friends in low places…

The child is taken to a convent to be raised by a strange order of nuns, who wear habits made of soiled feminine hygiene products. Alucarda (Tina Romero), who is shown now a young woman, finds a kindred spirit in Justine (Susana Kamini), who is taken in by the convent after the death of her parents. The beautiful, soft-featured Justine stands in bold contrast against her pale, raven-haired new friend. Be-frocked in heavy, head-to-toe black, Alucarda’s behaviour is unabashed. She takes Justine out into the woods to show her the many “secrets” she has discovered there.



The two girls encounter a barnyard oddity (somebody, at some point, loved a goat out in those woods and spawned a whole new kind of ugly) who is eager to show them his collection of protective amulets. Justine is frightened of the gamey woodland peddler (Claudio Brook), and rightly so. Alucarda, on the other hand, is intrigued by the gypsy’s talk of fortune and alchemy.


“I see your dream clearly, your past and future.
You have come from the dew in the forest, and
there they will be waiting for you.
Strange creatures, they are,
and you must take care.”



Alucarda flees, in tears, with Justine following behind her. They come upon what appears to be an old church, which the Tampon Torture Nuns have graciously decorated in gore-soaked bed sheets. Alucarda feels she knows the place, somehow, although she is certain she has never been there before. She brazenly decides to look inside. The bosom friends are entering into a crypt.


“Are you afraid of dying?
I mean, dying loving each other.
Dying together, so we may live as one
forever, with the same blood always flowing
through our veins. Darling, darling Justine…
I live in you...Would you die for me?”



Just as the girls prepare to enter into a solemn death pact, Alucarda unwittingly opens her own mother’s coffin, and in doing so, releases a terrifying cacophony of unholy voices which torment her mind. Alucarda herself lapses into delirium, while poor Justine looks on in horror. Just before our raven-haired Hellcat begins pulling out her hair in large, bloody chunks, the girls are able to break the spell of paralyzing terror that the haunted place has cast upon them, and flee to the sanctity of the convent. But the “voices from the past” haunt them, still. The girls sense that something has travelled back with them; a dark malevolence perceptibly casting its shadow over their union.



Justine collapses during a particularly fire-and-brimstone-filled sermon at Our Lady of the Tampon Torture Nuns. When Alucarda is charged with the responsibility of watching over her delicate friend, the girls speak openly about their shared sense of impending doom. After but a few moments alone with Justine, Alucarda is in fits again. This time, she seems to have developed a rather intense distaste for Jesus Jewelry.

Alucarda seems quite possessed; omitting sounds which only dogs can hear, along with others which are both audible and extremely uncomfortable to humans. Calling out the names of the fallen angel, she suddenly a starring role in a rather intriguing, ritualistic tableau: Justine lies limp and helpless against a wall, as the Gypsy Goat Man (when did he get here?) dry humps her. Alucarda is propelled backward by the awesome force of her 70’s beaver, achieving top-notch contortion while continuing to wail in a demonic language.



Gypsy Goat Man strips Justine of her clothes, and binds her to Alucarda by hands and blood. In spirit, the girls are led into the woods to become the sensuous centerpiece in a bona fide Witches’ Sabbat, complete with raucous orgy touched by the hands of the Horned God himself!



As Justine and Alucarda become more entrenched in their erotic woodland adventures, the most benign of the Tampon Torture Nuns, Sister Anjelica (Tina French), works herself into a bloody, bombastic Jesus frenzy on the girls’ behalf, beseeching her Saviour to protect them from harm. A lightning bolt of Righteous Revenge strikes and kills the High Priestess, thus ending the unholy ritual, and Sister Anjelica takes a well-deserved moonwalk across a beam of heavenly light in celebration.

But the demonic merry-go-round hasn’t stopped spinning yet! During Daily Scripture Drill, Justine and Alucarda are caught snickering in the back of class. When confronted by Sister Germana, they erupt into anti-Christian philosophy. Oh, my!


“And this is what the Devil does:
he grants us virtues to expand his Kingdom,
the only valid one. God, with his lack of knowledge,
does not understand this truth, and opposes it
with false thoughts and prayers…
Satan, Satan, Satan! Our Lord and Master!”






Sister Germana (Adriana Roel) urges the girls to repent, but poor, confused Justine merely flops around, speechless, while Alucarda hovers in the darkness, stoic in her evil vows. The Sisters order them to prepare for Confession at once, although Justine barely looks like she’ll hold out until dinner time. Stricken with what is presumably the physical manifestation of her allegiance with the Devil, she quickly slips into her deathbed, and pulls up the covers.

Alucarda’s confession doesn’t go very well. After spewing even more anti-Christian philosophy, our dark heroine makes a sexual advance on Father Lazaro (David Silva) and is ordered banished from the convent. Father Lazaro and the Tampon Torture Nuns retire to the Whipping Lounge to unwind after a long day spent dealing with demonic little girls. They must save their strength for the Exorcism!



Sister Anjelica arrives with Dr. Oszek (Claudio Brook) to inject some reality into the torrid scene of nuns rolling around on the floor in ecstasy, and teenage girls strung up on crosses, their clothes torn off and their blood spilled.


“This is not an act of faith!
This is the most primitive expression of ignorance
I have ever seen! You have just killed Justine!”


Dr. Oszek takes Alucarda away to the safety of his own abode, where his blind, trusting daughter Daniela is primed and waiting for the Devil Girl’s seductive charms. When she first awakens in the strange, new environment, Alucarda reacts like a caged animal. There is something horribly familiar about the Doctor, no matter what he says to try to calm her. But once the helpless, innocent Daniela begins exploring Alucarda’s face with her soft fingertips, Devil Girl is enraptured again.

Back at Our Lady of the Tampon Torture Nuns, the Satanic shit continues to hit the fan! Dr. Oszek is called back to help after Justine’s body is discovered missing. When the carcass of one of the Tampon Torture Nuns is found charred, as though by “the fires of Hell,” Father Lazaro takes matters into his own, sanctimonious hands, and dismembers her remains with the Lord’s Sword.


“She was dead, but the Forces of Evil
had not abandoned her!”



Even Dr. Oszek is convinced now; it must be the work of the Devil! The Devil, working through the still-possessed, undead body of Justine! And what’s worse, Alucarda, probably still-possessed as well, and most definitely still alive, is back home – alone – with poor Daniela! Sweet Christ!

The house is deserted. Alucarda has gone back to the only home she has ever known: the convent. Sister Anjelica takes Dr. Oszek to the crypt deep in the woods, where Justine’s body lay marinating in a coffin full of blood. She springs from her resting place, slashing at Sister Anjelica with all the fury of Hell. The persistent Sister makes one last plea for Justine’s immortal soul, and at last, innocence and purity flickers once again in the girls’ eyes… Until Oszek and his gang of Priests come rushing in to ruin the tender moment by dousing it with Holy Water.



In her final, searing moments, Justine lunges at Sister Anjelica, tearing her throat out, before collapsing dramatically to the floor, leaving little more than a charred mound of un-undead flesh behind. The crusaders must now seek out and destroy the Devil Girl, by means of Exorcism. They find Alucarda in the convent proper, setting nuns on fire with the fully-realized force of her Devil-given powers. At her side is Daniela, frightened and defenseless. Alas, Alucarda’s special brand of scary love brings about the undue suffering of yet another innocent playmate. As the blind girl tumbles down the staircase, Alucarda’s face is marked briefly with remorse, followed immediately with even more Hellfire.



The tattered, old hide of Sister Anjelica is erected during a crucial moment in Alucarda’s fiery Exorcism. Held Christ-like in the face of the raving Devil Girl, it acts as the Ultimate Weapon against the Forces of Evil living deep within the child. Alucarda howls ferociously, and pulls her hair some more for old times’ sake, but God’s Army hath expunged the Devil Girl… While the convent and a sizeable portion of its inhabitants burns, so it was a win-win situation.



ALUCARDA is an absolute dream to watch, time and again. The artistry is as rich and vivid as the underlying themes of religious oppression, sexual repression, and love’s innocence. Every frame of Juan López Moctezuma’s masterpiece is exquisitely shot, staged, dressed, and lit, by a brilliant team of artists led by Kleomenes Stamatiades. The musical score, composed by Anthony Guefen, provides all the necessary dramatic nuances without overpowering the breathtaking imagery.

Tina Romero is phenomenal in the title role, with a face so expressive that she actually seems to communicate her character better during non-speaking scenes. Romero’s portrayal of Alucarda as a lost orphan searching for a sense of belonging is as believable as her portrayal of the shrieking Devil Girl with the hypnotic eyes. Always filmed in sharp contrast against Alucarda, Justine’s character balances Alucarda’s insolence with soft, virginal beauty. Susana Kamini’s delicate features and demure mannerisms endear her to the role of Justine, the perfect companion for Alucarda in her harrowing journey of self-exploration.

So, run – don’t walk – to the woodland clearing filled with writhing Satanists nearest you!!!


My Life with the Thrill Kill Kult





5/5 Kitty Skulls = Pick of the litter!

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Ginger Snaps (2000)


Caution: Spoilers Galore, Eh?


Brigitte was out in the garage, rounding up supplies, when her neighbour began to shriek hysterically. “It got our dog! It got Baxter!”

“Baxter is fertilizer… And everyone is, like, staring.” Brigitte (Emily Perkins) explained a moment later to her sister, who was sitting hunched over on her bed, applying a vicious-looking knife to her pale, narrow wrist. Brigitte goes on about the attack, but she is speaking primarily to herself. Her sister, Ginger (Katherine Isabelle), has other preoccupations.

“Wrists are for girls,” The pretty redhead exclaims, falling backward onto her bed in a way most befitting a teenage angster. “I’m slitting my throat… You should definitely hang.”

The twisted sisters are close, perhaps too close. The younger, more rational Brigitte can’t seem to find her way out from under big sister Ginger’s shadow. They do everything together, and have no friends but for each other. They even share a room. They also share a secret death pact, first declared when the girls were small children: “out by 16 or dead in the scene, but together forever. United against life as we know it.”



The girls have put together a pictorial for an assignment they have been given in class on Life in Bailey Downs. The sisters produce a slideshow featuring shockingly gruesome images of the two of them cloaked in grim death, their lives used up in a variety of ways, ranging from profuse pill hunger to lawnmower entrapment. While their teacher, “sickened” by the display, requests that the girls report to the Guidance Office, one of the Jock Cocks in the class (Jesse Moss) requests to see the photographs of Ginger again. The eldest sister smiles coyly. Her powers of sexual attraction are new to her, and she is yet unsure how to use them.

The Fitzgerald sisters are in a class all their own, really. They have no desire to fit in with their schoolmates, choosing instead to huddle together as though in a protective stance against all possible intrusions. To say they’re not the sort of girls who get invited to a lot of parties would be a fierce understatement. “High school is just a mindless, breeder machine. Total hormonal toilet. I’d rather wait it all out in our room.”

Unfortunately, Brigitte’s wish simply cannot be. After a field hockey altercation with Miss Teen Popularity, Trina Sinclair (Danielle Hampton), the Fitzgerald sisters vow revenge. Or, rather Ginger vows revenge, while Brigitte merely goes along for the ride, as is her usual practice.


"You let idiots get away with fucking you up.
That’s why the Big Buddha made me; to stop them.”




The prank the girls have in store for Trina is diabolically mean: they take some of their leftover photo shoot gore, and go out on a late night mission to swap the bimbo’s dog for a pile of quivering “remains,” to make the snob think her poor pooch has been claimed by the Beast of Bailey Downs. On the way to Trina’s house, the girls stumble across something much better than their plastic bag of makeshift meat: a fresh, mangled kill, presumably that of another neighbourhood dog. Brigitte notes that the carcass is still warm.

Out of the surrounding trees comes a lightning-quick predator to snatch Ginger, screaming, out of sight. Calling desperately to her sister, Brigitte enters the woods to find Ginger pleading for her life while a giant wolf tears her to bloody shreds. Brigitte finds the courage to fend off the animal with a bludgeon, and the girls flee the woods together. The wolf creature is hot on their tracks, until a speeding van finally comes between them. In shock, the sisters continue to make their way home.



Oddly, by the time they reach the safety of their room, Ginger’s wounds have already begun to heal. She convinces Brigitte not to call for a doctor, and more importantly, not to tell Mom.

Ginger is going through a difficult time, developmentally. She’s recently been blessed with a functioning menstrual cycle (better late than never), and she is just now coming into power as a sexual being. She suddenly finds she has a lot more time for the Jock Cocks. But there are other things, too. Weirder things; like the white fur growing out of the wound from her animal attack.


“I can’t have a hairy chest, B. That’s fucked!”



Brigitte lays the werewolf card out on the table, but Ginger only laughs, and thanks her sister for taking her hormonal problems so seriously. The two of them continue drifting apart as Ginger’s hunger to blossom into wolfey womanhood deepens. She can’t help it if Brigitte is immature, and not ready to move on yet.

In a schoolhouse scene reminiscent of Scott Teen Wolf Howard’s triumphant showing at the Spring Dance, Ginger shows up in locker alley with a new attitude, and hot new look, to boot! All her peers drop what they are doing in order to: stop, stare, and go: “Ooooooo!”

Her sister Brigitte is not amused, but she’s got other pots boiling on the stove. Suddenly, she’s a major point of interest for the cute Campus Drug Dealer, Sam (Chris Lemche), who hit the animal that attacked Ginger on that fateful night. He produces from his pocket a Polaroid snapshot of the beast that Brigitte had dropped near his van. He mentions the word “lycanthrope,” and Brigitte’s blood runs cold.


“That would explain the huge, uncircumcised dick,
and why you were running for your life from it.”



Fearing he is getting too close to the topic she has been secretly researching on her sister’s behalf, Brigitte rushes off without giving the boy any more of her time, or even her name. Later that night, she realizes the stakes are much higher than she estimated, when she discovers her sisters’ little nub of a tail.

She is forced to seek out the Campus Drug Dealer in the morning to enlist his help. For the sake of protecting Ginger’s secret, she tells him that she was the one who was bitten. Brigitte knows she hasn’t much time to stop the change, as the moon is nearing the completion of its cycle. On top of that, Ginger is ovulating, and suddenly the easiest girl in school. In the backseat of Jock Cock’s car, a certain kind of magick happens.


“I get this ache… I thought it was for sex,
but it’s to tear everything to fucking pieces.”




Ginger leads Brigitte to her victim’s final resting place, next door. The fat kid in the hockey outfit just won’t be the same without his yappy, little dog, Norman.



Brigitte takes Ginger to meet with her new friend Sam, as Ginger is suspicious of his willingness to help. The young apothecary produces a horticultural text on the benefits of monkshood in curing humans of uncharacteristically wolfish behaviour, while Ginger engages in territorial pissings with her sisters’ new boyfriend before taking off in a jealous huff.

A terrible accident occurs during yet another altercation with Trina Sinclair, who finds herself unable to cry over the spilled milk she slips on, mostly because she is irrefutably dead. Brigitte and Ginger scramble to clean up the mess before their parents get home, oh-so-narrowly avoiding catastrophe.



“If I wasn't here, would you eat her?”



“No! God, that’d be like fucking her!”


Brigitte lays down the law: keep Ginger hidden until her fate is certain, then get the fuck out of Dodge, together. Just as they had always planned.

Things continue to unravel for the Fitgerald sisters. Their mother knows that the police are seeking to question them about Trina Sinclair’s disappearance. It is during a fumbling lecture that Brigitte discovers a bunch of monkshood, which Mrs. Fitzgerald (Mimi Rogers) has just purchased from a craft store for a flower arrangement. Brigitte promises her sister that she will learn how to use it, and that the two of them will run away together, before it’s too late. When Brigitte slips out to confer with Sam, she barricades Ginger in the bathroom.



In a tender moment following numerous scenes of alchemistic eye candy, Sam indicates to Brigitte that he has seen through her rouse all along: "Understand that you may kill her trying to save her." Brigitte leaves Sam, and returns home to find that Ginger has broken out of the bathroom. The hunt begins…

Did I mention it just happens to be Halloween? Brigitte encounters Jock Cock, who has come down with the same illness as her sister, assailing a little trick-or-treater, and is forced to use her anti-werewolf potion on the foamy-fanged lad. She is relieved to discover that the solution Sam cooked up for her works! Cock Jock wakes up from his wolven frenzy, as though from a bad dream. Now that Brigitte has the cure, it is even more imperative that she find Ginger before it’s too late.


Ginger is in the Guidance Office, pretty far-gone on the lycanthrope scale, standing amid the bloody aftermath of her latest kill. Once again, younger sister must help big sister clean up after her indulgent atrocities. Meanwhile, in the midst of a little backyard gardening, their parents unearth a chunk of Trina Sinclair. Mrs. Fitzgerald assures her husband that the severed fingers are merely props left over from the girls’ death project, but the look on her face suggests that she isn’t buying her own excuse.

Before Brigitte can make it back to the Guidance Office with some commercial strength cleaning supplies, Ginger finds herself another chew toy. This time, it's the kindly, old Asian janitor who has taken a shining to the younger Fitzgerald sister.


“It feels so good, Brigitte. It’s like touching yourself,
you know? Every move, right on the fucking dot...
I’m a goddamn force of nature.
I feel like I could do just about anything..."




Ginger eyes her sister strangely, almost sexually. Eating her would be like fucking her. A look of panic washes over Brigitte’s face, but Ginger doesn’t want to eat her. She wants to be with her, always. Like a new pact.


“I said I’d die for you!”

“No, you said you’d die with me,
because you had nothing better to do.”



Ginger erupts in anger and takes off, leaving Brigitte lying in the corridor to contemplate the final showdown, which is inevitable. The stage is set: there is a big, Halloween bash going down at the greenhouse where Sam the Knowledgeable Drug Dealer cultivates his herbs. As soon as she can get to her feet, Brigitte puts her combat boots to pavement and races there. A van pulls up beside her as she attempts to hitch a ride. It’s her mother. She knows about Trina Sinclair, and wants to help. She isn’t about to let anything happen to her Tiny Babies.

Mrs. Fitzgerald waits in the car while Brigitte makes her way inside the greenhouse to claim her sister. She finds her in the back room, making advances on Sam. Brigitte has had enough of her sisters’ selfishness. She takes up a blade, and exchanges blood once again with Ginger.


“You wrecked everything for me
that isn’t about you...
Now, I am you.”



Suddenly, Ginger’s voice takes on a considerably more testosteroney quality, and they realize that the sand has nearly drained from the hourglass. Soon, the moon will be full, and if Ginger’s transformation isn’t stopped before then, there will be no turning back for her. They leave their mother at the party, and take off with Ginger in the back of Sam’s Mystery Mobile to “get the stuff” (monkshood). Wolfed to the Max at this point, Ginger breaks loose from the vehicle and heads into the house for a game of hide and seek.

While cooking up a batch of Werewolf B. Gone in the pantry with Brigitte, the dashing, young Sam slaps her with a tempting proposition: take the cure herself, and run away with him. But Brigitte already belongs to another. True to her sister to the foreseeably-bitter end, she insists they persevere.

Kiss your boyfriend goodbye, Brigitte…



Ginger serves Sam up as an offering to her little sister. Brigitte tries to resist the allure of his syrupy, crimson essence, but suffers a momentary lapse of reason due to the fact that she is feeling somewhat wolfey herself, of late. Sam is choking on his final breaths while the Fitzgerald sisters lap up the blood flowing from his wounds.



Her humanity returned to her in an instant, Brigitte refuses to become what Ginger has become. The climactic final showdown between them takes place, appropriately enough, in the bedroom they shared for so many years.


“I’m not dying in this room with you!”



Ginger lunges, falling on Brigitte’s blade. The broken beast that lies gasping in a pool of its own blood dies in her sisters’ arms.



I always cry when I watch this movie through to the end. I am wiping a salty stream from my face even as I write this, in fact. Ginger Snaps triggers my empathic nerve because of the fact that I see so much of myself in it. My own sister and I are a lot like Ginger and Brigitte, right down to the colourful, oh-so-typically Canadian lingo which spews from their mouths in every frame. We look out for one another, protect one another, and love one another almost to the exclusion of all else.

The taut tale, written by Karen Walton, was lighthearted and comical at times, while never losing sight of the end goal, which was to produce a serious horror film. Ginger Snaps delivers top-notch tension and suspense, teamed with fabulously-gory makeup effects. John Fawcett’s direction of this picture is superb; the only complaint I have is that some of the scenes ran a little long to me, and could possibly have benefited from being edited down. However, I can’t help but feel that the long, loving gazes the lens would fix on the Fitzgerald sisters was an indication of the director’s obvious passion for the story, and the characters which live in it.



Or, perhaps he was simply as captivated as I was with the unmistakable chemistry between Katharine Isabelle and Emily Perkins as Ginger and Brigitte Fitzgerald. While both of the young actresses did a remarkable job in the realization of their respective roles (particularly with regard to the special bond they shared as not only sisters, but also social outcasts), Ms. Perkins’ star outshines that of Ms. Isabelle considerably. Her execution of the strong, conflicted character, Brigitte, is nothing short of brilliant. While Isabelle’s performance hits all the right notes in leaving the viewer with a lasting impression of Ginger slowly becoming a sleek, sexy killer wolf, Perkins is absolutely effortless as she delivers one of the meatiest female performances in recent genre memory.

Last, but certainly not least, I'd like to say a few words about Mimi Rogers in the role of Mrs. Pamela Fitzgerald: Fan. Fucking. Tastic. A true, comedic ninja, Rogers nails the cookie-baking, heart-to-heart talk-having, holiday print shirt-wearing mother directly and accurately to the wall, while John Bourgeois props her up as the Clueless Husband.

A number of sequels (and even a prequel) have followed this original title, but none of them have even come close to achieving the perfectly-balanced level of technical prowess, artistic brilliance, and undeniable screen magic as the initial effort.







5/5 Kitty Skulls = Pick of the litter!